A Man of Two Halves

It has been an extraordinary weekend for globe-saving superhero and part-time Albian Prime Minister Bragdny Door, chiefly because it has afforded a chance to see both sides of his personality. Mr Door began by showing off his superheroic side, saving the famous "Not-So-Special Relationship" with America, using his superspeed (and vast amounts of begging by his officials) to secure the first meeting by a European leader with President Obama. The news of his triumph was accompanied by an outpouring of pride amongst Albians and a small explosion in the private chambers of the Elysee Palace.

Not satisified with this, the Prime Minister went on to launch a superheroic onslaught against the evil bankers of Da Zhiti with a column in Da Onluukka(1), calling for an urgent return to old-fashioned banking and an end to light-touch regulation, irresponsible lending and worship of bankers.

Yet even a superhero needs the odd moment to relax, a little bit of "me time". And, to this end, almost every costumed crusader since the days of Superman himself has employed a secret identity - usually some klutzy misfit, eager and willing but ill-at-ease with other people, whose bumbling behaviour frequently lands him or her in all kinds of trouble. SuperBragdny is no exception, his alter ego being none other than ex-Finance Minister Bragdny Door, seller of gold at the bottom of the market, raider of pension funds and cheerleader(2) for "new paradigm economies" filled with crazily-irresponsible lending, ultra-light-touch regulation and bankers being worshipped on a scale that would have embarrassed Rameses II. Albians can only thank their lucky stars they have SuperBragdny to sort out this bumbling idiot's mistakes.

(1) Sunday sister paper to Da Garindua.
(2) Admittedly alongside most of the Krep, Nyesti and Drid parties, much of the media and every git you ever met at a noughties dinner party who could never tire of telling you how much the price(3) of their home had risen in the previous femtosecond.
(3) NB "price" not "value".